Happy Birthday Chatty's Little Sis!!

Congratulations to me -- I've been a big sister for 40 years now!! (You'd think I'd be good at it by now)

**Happy Bday, Jen**

Seems like decades ago
She looked in the mirror
And an 8 year old girl
Smiled back at her

Seems like yesterday
She looked at me
A wide eyed princess
Touching my pearls

It was only last year
We looked at each other
And I can remember
Her being older

Being daughter to Mom
Missing Dad for so long
Mature discussions
Having wise emotions

We stand now together
Becoming stronger
Not much younger now
My grown up sister

"I love you Miss Hannigan!"

Today I watched the 1999 Victor Garber, Kathy Bates, Kristin Chenoweth version of "Annie." Besides the fact that Kathy Bates will do ANYTHING for the camera (which scares me a little bit) I loved it! I wish life was an Annie movie.

• Every couple of years someone new gets a chance to be the lead.
• Everyone gets lots of Christmas presents.
• Big bald single guys adopt little girls and AREN'T creepy.
• Guys named "Rooster" ARE creepy.
• Red headed freckle-y girls are't called step-children
  
• The sun always comes out tomorrow.
• The bad guys get what's comin' to them.
  
• Maids and butlers aplenty!
• Of course, life would be a musical.
  
• Little girls get their happy ending.

What a lovely life!

My Franken-teeter

Yesterday I got the call that moms the world around dread. "Mom, I cracked my head open." OMG!!!! My baby was in Denver. I was not. My heart flew there quite rapidly.

When Stephen explained, after first saying "Mom, breathe! Breathe, Mom!" He said that he walked out into the warehouse at his job and apparently ran into a steel . . . uh, thingy that crashed into his noggin. He fell down, bumped the back of his head and passed out. He woke to much blood on his face and hands. He said, "It's ok, Mom. I went to Walgreen's and bought band aids and superglue." SUPERGLUE????? I knew my child wanted to prove what a big boy he is and how very capable he is handling these things that cause me great stress. I gently (it could happen!), ok, who am I kidding. I told him to RUN DON'T WALK to the nearest emergency room and get checked out immediately!! Not even a firmly worded lecture on clean underwear! (I know when I'm wasting my words.)

Seven stitches later, he's good as new (he says anyway.) I am rather proud of him. Maybe he'll be inspired to become a doctor and write me good prescriptions.











There does seem to be a pattern. He cracked the BACK of his head open a couple years ago and didn't tell me about it until several days later. I gotta admit, though, he did a good job. He went to the emergency room, even used all the proper insurance info and 12 staples later he stopped doing karate with people who kicked him into corner walls. (Personally, I think he enjoyed this one because he didn't have to wash his hair for 9 or 10 months!)

Stephen also broke an arm once. Is he out to destroy himself or ME???!!! This child loves to see his momma all worked up. I just wanna cuddle and bubble wrap him. I told him I would return him to where he came from for all the damage he's incurred. He assured me that his warranty has expired. Oh, and he thinks the scar might be cool cuz it's kinda lightening bolt-y. What can I say? He's a glass half full kinda guy!! I love you, Teeter!

College Road Trip

I just watched College Road Trip, which the Chatty-Husband talked me OUT of buying for our collection. (He said "your sister will probably put it in your stocking anyway!" This is one of the reasons I love my sister and if she's reading this, I hope she knows that there is a spot on the shelf right next to Mulan all ready.) I don't recommend this movie to anyone who has lost their dad recently. And by recently, I mean ever.

Donny Osmond is the best part of this movie. He's not a good actor. But there is a dusty corner of my heart that belongs to him, which means I accept his attempt at guest starring roles and his ability to mock himself. Ahhh.

The SECOND best part of the movie was a surprise to me - Lucas Grabeel, or to HSM fans, Ryan Evans! He plays Scooter and ends up underneath my first unrequited love at the end of the movie. (He gets all the good roles!)

Overall, the movie was sweet. Raven-Symone was adorable, as always. I tried to imagine Martin Lawrence NOT telling Donny Osmond to F*** off between takes and all was good.

SAD NEWS at the Chatty House

Molly Mae

January 10, 1998
-
June 27, 2008

*UPDATES*

Molly and Shelby are back in business. No uppy-chucky in a week now!

Stephen's band had an awesome concert Friday night in Boulder, Colorado. Remember, that's www.myspace.com/therougeband Their T-shirts are very cutting edge, also!

Work is good. Ron's going to be able to say that again soon, also. Sean's working lots for the Air Force Reserves. Stephen continues to live and work at his dream. Speaking of . . .

Several years ago, we were guests at a Journey concert, courtesy of their drummer, Deen Castronovo and my BFF. He's a dear friend and nearly related. I was so proud to stand in the third row, center stage and hear him yell my name from his mic several times. He's amazingly talented on the drums and vocals. At the end of the concert, Deen aimed and threw one of his drumsticks directly at me. I caught it effortlessly and at the same time a very inebriated man standing next to me, grabbed my wrist. I said "I caught it. Let go." He begged me for it and eventually offered me $50.00. I told him very emphatically that it was not for sale. Then he offered me $100.00 and I thought, "well, isn't everything really for sale??" So, still with our arms up - mine on a drumstick and his on my wrist, I asked him to . . . well, show me the money. He pulled out a $100.00 bill and you know he woke up the next morning with a drumstick in his wallet and less money, saying "What the heck?? - I gotta stop drinking." Me? Well, I left smiling even bigger.

The reason I told this story (besides it's about Journey, for goodness sake) is that I got to watch my wonderfully talented son tossing drumsticks to the crowd after his concert in Boulder. The crowd went wild and several fans even fought it out. This is what it's like when a story comes full circle. And it's phenomenal.

You Just Haven't Lived 'Til Ya . . .

My sweet girls, Molly & Shelby, have been sick all week. They've both been throwing up lots and with directions from the vet to administer Kaopectate, it hasn't improved. So my story today proves complete and utter devotion in the face of complete and utter . . . uh, sickness.

Several nights this week I've had to get up in the middle of the night to change all the bedding because Shelby has yakked her little tummy all over the sheets/blankets. Last night was one for the record books. She had been doing fairly well most of the day so she didn't get any medecine. Last night when I went to bed, I found out she wasn't doing very well. And she didn't do very well all over my down comforter, bedspread, sheets and a pillow. I gave her Kaopectate, cuddled and told her it was OK and then we went to bed on sleeping bags.

Sometime during the night I awoke to the sound of dry heaving under the blankets. I was so sleepy, I petted her and went back to sleep. Soon, I felt Shelby move up above me and cuddle on top of my pillow. Her tummy continued gurgling. I reached up to console her, glanced up at just the exact time she puked her little tiny guts out all over me. Yep, all over my face. I woke Ron up so he could get me something to wipe up with and because I wanted to share life's little injustice. It almost sounds funny right now but last night, I was really, really . . . uh, grossed out. I washed up, put that bedding in the pile "with the rest o' it" and tried to go back to sleep with a bath towel for a blanket. (Next stop Sean's bed.) Poor Shelby.

So today when you think, "Gosh, Macy's is out of the sandals I drove across town to buy" or "I hate it when I buy non-fat creamer on accident," just remember me. All bile covered and sleepy. Still wanted to comfort a little girl whose only crime was to be sick - in the wrong place. Yeah, I love her THAT much!

Suicide is NOT Painless

This past week our family was touched by an indescribable tragedy. This story began over a year ago. There was a man who was once my husband's boss at work and was married to one of my dearest Colorado friends and a person I enjoyed, respected and genuinely liked. Sometime around the end of 2006/beginning of 2007 he began making really selfish and shockingly stupid choices in his life. These choices determined the future of his devoted wife and his two sons. He decided he wanted another women and that desire was more important than his family and his successful Air Force career.

The divorce was final in November of 2007. Many of us who watched this downward spiral throughout the year commented on how surreal this all felt. This man, who had previously been quite emotionally absent for his family, began to give his boys the attention they had wanted. Then, just like a movie, the girlfriend, who had previously destroyed families before this one, much like a wrecking ball and with the same sense of conscience, eventually ended the relationship. Apparently, he realized he had given up EVERYTHING for this woman - to include his integrity - and it was too much for him.

With a lot of planning and preparation, he took his own life this week. He left his boys with a trauma that will always be with them. He showed them that their lives weren't worth him sticking around. He showed them that you can be beaten down. And you don't have to get up. And he role-modeled the very worst example possible.

My life has been touched by suicide before, unfortunately. There are those who commit that act who deserve the deepest sympathy. One friend described it like this: "He was never able to make a meaningful connection to life." There are those who hurt emotionally or even physically so bad that they can never see hope and they just want the pain to end. And I know I shouldn't judge people because I haven't walked in their shoes. But I also know that suicide hurts the loved ones left behind more than words could ever express.

I think when there are children involved, the playing field is completely changed. We bring our kids into the world. They deserve to grow up with parents. Most parents say they would give their lives for their child. I call that normal. That's not even heroic. Every child deserves that much love. For a parent to take what has been referred to as "the coward's way out," is saying "Your life is not important to me. My feelings are more important. I don't want to be here anymore and regardless of the effect that will have on everyone who cares about me and anyone who tries to love them in the future, I'm going to do what I feel like doing right now." No one ever said being a parent is easy. Maybe that's one of the hardest things - to stick around for them and be engaged no matter what you're going through.

I wish I knew who in my life right now was even considering that sort of thing and I could wrap my arms around them and tell them that NOTHING is so bad. There will always be hope but you have to bring it to yourself sometimes. Our own happiness is our own responsibility. But suicide? Parents, brothers and sisters, spouses or partners, and above all else, children - deserve better.

Bye-bye, Toby

I'm very sad because my dear friend, DeAnn, lost her dear Toby. He was old but I still remember when he wasn't. I had never had a friend with a boxer breed dog and so he was the first one. Since then, their family has added others but none are Toby. This is for DeAnn, Les, Charles, James and Samuel:

Tribute to a Best Friend
Sunlight streams through window pane unto a spot on the floor....

Then I remember, It's where you used to lie, but now you are no more.

Our feet walk down a hall of carpet, and muted echoes sound....

Then I remember, It's where your paws would joyously abound.

A voice is heard along the road, and up beyond the hill.

Then I remember it can't be yours....

Your golden voice is still.

But I'll take that vacant spot of floor and empty muted hall

And lay them with the absent voice and unused dish along the wall.

I'll wrap these treasured memorials in a blanket of my love

And keep them for my best friend until we meet above.

Bye, Toby.

Happy B, Tee!

My baby is 20!! Ron and I spent the day with our little guy in Denver. We shopped, we ate, we took pictures and shopped some more. What a terrific time! I've included some pictures so you can all feel a part of our day.

Ron and I spent lots of time today thinking about all the reasons we are so proud of the birthday boy. He's grown up to become such an incredible, loving, brilliant, talented, honest and hard-working young man. I couldn't ask for better sons than the two I'm so lucky to call my own. One of my most favorite things about Stephen is the way he hugs - he totally hugs with his heart. Like any completely enamored mother, I stand in awe at this great human being. And I give thanks to the universe for his life. And for my tiny part of it all.

The Perfect Day!

I know this posting is a little overdue. On Easter we traveled to Denver to our nearest Old Spaghetti Factory and spent the day together - just the four of us. It was great! We have such diverse schedules that this doesn't happen very often. We went to a nice park. The boys romped, ran and didn't cooperate one little bit for their "capture-every-single-moment-on-film-mom."It's no Hawaii. Not even Canada. But we had our day in the sun. No one got sick or cried too much. It included no airport security or border crossing. And it was glorious.

Some days are just paperwork . . .

I just returned from THE Walmart. And I still can't believe I saw this myself. This is usually the stuff you get forwarded to your email and you never know when someone's "doctored up" their photo. And who even knows who actually took the picture.

Well, I assure you, this picture was taken by ME. And I'm no doctor (as far as you know!) It's not the clearest because I was trying not to be too conspicuous. I'm classy that way. And even when Ron picked me up off the floor, while I was hysterically laughing my a** off, I was sorta kinda maybe a little discreet. And also it was taken with my blackberry, which I will never use for special family portrait sittings because they don't take the best pictures. Also, I probly wasn't holding the camera very steady. And I will probably go to hell for putting this picture on my blog.

PUT ON YOUR GAME FACE!!

The rules: Use the first letter of your middle name to answer each of the following. They have to be real places, names, things, nothing made up. You CAN’T use your name for the boy/girl name questions.

• Middle name letter: A
  
• Famous artist/band/musician: Abba
  
• Four-letter word: acid
  
• U.S. state: Alaska
  
• Boy name: Aaron
  
• Girl name: Abby
  
• Animal: Aardvark
  
• Something in the kitchen: asparagus
  
• Reason for being late:A line at Starbucks
  
• Body part: Ankle
  
• Drink: Absolut Vodka
  
• Something you shout: Attagirl!
  
• Something you eat: Apple

My sister made me. If you want to take part in the game, please copy and paste into comments and do your own!

The Heinie Chronicles - Part 3

So I continue to work on this "Simple Steps" stuff. I'm not great at any of it, but if I keep making those daily attempts, I'm bound to get good at SOMETHING!

WEEK 2 gives the next four assignments:

• Keep a food journal - who hasn't tried this?! They're right, though, because I know firsthand that I've skipped eating something unhealthy just because I couldn't dare put it in writing. Some food journals take it a step farther and say to write next to the entry, what emotions you're experiencing at that time. Another thing I thought was interesting is to think about eating something healthy instead of the jalapeno poppers. If apple and pear slices don't sound appealing, maybe I'm just not hungry. Sometimes simplicity can be darn-right brilliant!!

• Set up a laundry system. Well, since Ron's not working right now, HE'S my laundry system. But once he's working again, I'll be putting together a schedule so it's not such an overwhelming task. And it will include a timer.

• Do isometrics. I have my drive to work and back divided mentally into 6 sections. During section one, I work on isometrics in my neck/shoulders. Section two I do stomach/butt isometrics and so on . . . I try to do kegels at all the red lights. (I SO don't want to be a pee-pants old lady someday!)

• Take a good multi-vitamin. It's a proven fact that women who take a good multi-vitamin everyday have more energy and lose weight much more effectively. When we're lacking certain nutrients, our bodies don't process food well. We store it to sap out all the nutrients we are lacking otherwise. A good multi-vitamin helps all the body processes work better. I've been taking Juice Plus capsules for the past year. As soon as I finish those up, I'm going to a good vitamin/mineral combo from USANA. I've heard great things about their products and I've taken their CoQuinone 30 for awhile and my migraines are way less often. (Good thing - next step was to cut my head off or put a screwdriver through my eye.)

Chatty-Kath's extra tip:

• Do something beautiful for yourself! This week, bleach your teeth. With the over the counter products available these days, there is NO excuse for dingy teeth.
  

• If you're exhausted and can't stand the thought of getting up to do anything but also hate the thought of waking up to a dirty kitchen AGAIN, set the kitchen timer for 20 minutes and work until it goes off. I get a lot done this way. And sometimes, the timer goes off and I'm so happy with the progress I see, I reset it and keep going!
  

The Heinie Chronicles - Part 2

I recently found a great book on CD called "SIMPLE STEPS: 10 WEEKS TO GETTING CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE" by Lisa Lelas et al. I started listening to it on the way to and from work everyday. It keeps me off the constant news channels and I hope it's improving my attitude. Anyhoo, I challenge any one out there to get it (I got it at the library) and "start the program."

Every week you get assignments from 4 different catagories. For instance,

Week One:

• Drink 8 glasses of water everyday
• Clean out one drawer, cupboard or closet each week
• Take a 20 minute brisk walk everyday
• Save $2 from your budget daily

I was recently at a conference for work, and they recommended "AquaMantra." It's bottled water with mantra's printed on them such as "I am loved, I am lucky, I am healthy." Nice messages but at $2/bottle, I can print my own! I put several of my own goals on a label and stuck it on my water bottle at work. Every time I take a drink, I'm reminded that "I only eat foods that are healthy" and "I drink lots of water."

I cleaned out my personal drawer at work. Now I only have all the drawers, cabinets and closets at home to clean. At one per week, I'll be caught up by 2011. Baby steps . . .

I have been taking walks around the community where I work. Instead of having the service technicians put notices out to residents, I'm walking out there and doing it myself. I'm making several people happy this way!

Save $2 per day?? Ok, I thought about going to Starbucks everyday this week but only went once.

So, I'm most excited about the "getting control" part. It's easy to feel like I have no control - everything in life is determined by something or someone else. So, instead of that defeatist attitude, I'll try their way. I would love to hear from anyone out there who wants to try this as well. I may just post the weekly assignments on my blog to save you from having to find the book.

Chuck Night

Chatty-Kath here. I spent my evening last night watching "I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry" and "Good Luck Chuck." I would now like some of those hours back. I love Kevin James and Adam Sandler, but it wasn't as hilarious as the previews would make one think. It did have a great message about friendship and made me think about how far would I go for my friend. That part was actually sweet and touching.

Good luck, Chuck??? More like Lame Duck Chuck. It was HORRIBLE. And the clip it ran after the credits was just plain sick. I used to like penguins. I think this movie ruined that for me. Dane Cook and Jessica Alba are probably really nice people. I just hate what they spent their last year doing.

For the record, Chuck Norris takes back his approval.

Happy Day to Jen & Vic!

Happy Anniversary to my little sis and her guy! Seems like 11 years of wedded bliss can go so fast! I hope you have 111 more!

Color Me Orange & Blue

On Friday, I attended a trade show for the apartment association. I went to a few classes and had lunch with some of my favorite co-workers. Our luncheon speaker was a man named Reggie Rivers. Apparently, he played for the Denver Broncos in the 90's and fumbled a few balls (is that a bad thing??) And because I know absolutely nothing about football (that is what the Broncos play, right??!!) I was totally not impressed by his sports stories. But I absolutely LOVED his stories about everything else. He is a most hilarious speaker! And I had to buy the new book he was hocking - "My Wife's Boyfriend and Our Feud with the Highlands Ranch Homeowners Association." I haven't read it yet, but it's signed and I connected eye to eye with this magnificent looking gorgeous hunka hunka burning love. Did I mention he's lovely to look at?? I've attached his picture to my post so you can all admire this yummy specimen.

The lesson in his talk was about how some things in life are completely out of your control. But the two things you ALWAYS have in your control are your attitude and your effort. And although I know he's right on paper, it's really really hard to control your attitude when so many people in this world are mean, stupid, moronic and thoughtless. Maybe if he would work one on one with me, I would get better at this. :-)

Mentally, I made a list of everything I loved about this man. I've included that list because I'm thoughtful that way.

• Yummy to look at
• Very intelligent
• Strong and muscl-y
  
• Nice voice
• three words: BUNS OF STEEL
  

Instead, I have 4 out of 5 of those qualities at home and right now he's cleaning my house. Ahhhh. I'm really in love.
Touchdown!

Today's the day!!

Happy Birthday, my dear sweet 8-year-old niece, Katie!

Countdown to Ka-kee day!

In four days, I will have been a true, legal and official Auntie for EIGHT years! My dear, sweet niece was born in 2000 and given my name. Although she's called "Katie" she knows her REAL name. And at a time when I couldn't wait for her to call my name, she adopted "Appie" as the best way to pronounce this person who came to visit, armed with gifts and kisses. It's the greatest nickname ever! And as with my big 21-year-old son, we just never forget all the mispronunciations. They're adorable and will always be part of our family's lingo. Just to name a few . . .

• Buh-FOO-ter: computer (Sean)
• KAY-kee: Katie (Katie)
• GACK: Jack (Katie)
• PIE-der: spider (Stephen)
• YIP-tick:lipstick (Sean - why was he saying that??!!)
• PARE-pane: airplane (Sean)
• AP-pee: Auntie Chatty-Kath (Katie)
• PIE-ruhts ov da CA-wa-BE-uhn: Pirates of the Carribean (Jack)
• I not WEE-uhd: I'm not weird (Jennifer)
  

You don't live anything down in MY family!

Happy Birthday, Sean!

Sean's been late a few times in his life. His birth was one of those times. I was overdue by two whole weeks and finally my labor was scheduled to be induced. So the morning of February 2, 1987, we arrived at Fairchild Air Force Base Hospital for the biggest event in our young lives. I don't remember many specifics of the day (thanks to the drugs) but I do remember pushing for all I was worth starting at 6 pm and finally birthing my little watermelon at 6:16 pm. Sean was absolutely perfect! Ten tiny fingers and ten tiny toes and all the things he needed in all the right places. Ron and I were very, very proud!

And we continue to be proud of our little guy. He's a reserve Air Force airman. He's finishing his college career in Network Security at Colorado Tech University. He's responsible. He's brilliant. He's a fantastic person and we like him as much as we love him!

Go Sean!
Happy Birthday, Super-Son!!!

That's my baby!

Check out Stephen's new band site
www.myspace.com/therougeband

TGI . . . ESMWNOSBU!

Thank goodness it's . . . early Saturday morning when no one should be up.

I decided to try sleeping a night without my usual OTC sleeping pill. Really bad idea. I've been up now for over 2 hours trying to be useful. When I'm reduced to Wikipedia-ing Bruce Jenner and Oksana Baiul, I know I should be in bed sleeping.

Since I really hate to finish out my night without some sense of usefulness, I'm sharing one thing I learned. I remember reading years ago that Ben Vereen was hit by a car, while walking down the road. Well, tonight I learned the driver was composer David Foster (who used to be married to Linda Thompson, who used to be married to Bruce Jenner.) I'm officially throwing out my David Foster Christmas CD. I mean, NO ONE hurts my Chicken George and gets away with it! (Besides this really sends a message out to Mr Foster - "10 and 2, Dude! 10 and 2!")

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BFF and BFF SIS!

Today is one of my favorite days of the year! My BFF is celebrating her birthday today. And as if that isn't enough, she shares this day with her big sister, Shelly. My bestest wishes and all my love to you both! It's their birthday, but I'm the one who keeps getting this wonderful gift of friendship - day after day after day after day . . .

A good friend is a connection to life - a tie to the past, a road to the future, the key to sanity in a totally insane world. ~Lois Wyse

We have been friends together. In sunshine and in shade.
~Caroline Sheridan Norton

A true friend reaches for your hand and touches your heart. ~Author Unknown

Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for a while, leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never, ever the same. ~Flavia Weedn

Happy Birthday, Lori and Shelly! You deserve the best day ever!

PS: Yesterday I heard Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons on the radio and I felt like I was in San Francisco at The Jersey Boys with my BFF all over again!

Happy Birthday, Vonda!!

I'm a day late and a dollar short, but I still remembered your day. I'm excited to know that NEXT year's birthday, you will be stateside!

The Heinie Chronicles - Part 1

It's the beginning of the year and most of us have some vague resolution to "lose weight." In order to make my goal, I've decided to try public humiliation. Lord knows private humiliation doesn't work for me! I've been reading all the right books and articles for years so the excuse of not knowing WHAT to do doesn't fly. In a nutshell this is what I've learned and am trying to apply:

• Eat more fruits and vegetables
• Exercise regularly
• Sleep 7+ hours every night
• Drink more water

I've been a "juicer/blender" for years. At the risk of sounding kooky, these juices really shouldn't include vodka. Juicing is when the pulp is extracted and you just drink the liquid from the fruit or vegetables. I prefer blending - drinking the juice and pulp. It's more filling. My favorite fruit blender is: 2 bananas, 2 oranges, 1 apple, 1 head of romaine lettuce and 2 cups of cold water. I use a Vita-Mix (a really high speed blender) which purees everything. For my vegetable blend, I use 3 carrots, 3 celery stalks, 3 cucumbers and 1 apple. I put apple in everything! I sweetens the drinks up and it's really super good for me! I try to drink 8 ounces of either drink every 3 hours throughout the day to keep my blood sugar levels even. Obviously I eat food at meals as well. I'm not a huge meat eater, but I eat beef, turkey and fish several times a week. Boil kidney beans or soak overnight, rinse and drain several times, use a tad bit of salt, heat up and it's not bad. Very filling. I'm trying to incorporate more lentils, too.

For exercise I'm mostly jogging on my mini-trampoline. No excuses for bad weather. I put on my MP3 and lose myself in the world of whatever music I choose. One of my biggest struggles with this is that I get too driven and don't want to spend less than an hour at a time. I have to constantly remind myself that even 20 minutes of sweating on the mini-tramp is invaluable to my journey. After about 15 minutes I feel that funny endorphin feelin' kicking in. It's so great - I feel capable of doing anything.

Sleep? What's that?? I have to take fake benedryl every evening to get a decent night's sleep. I'm hoping this is the beginning of my heinie chronicles and by trying to do all these other good things, I'll begin to sleep well on my own at some point. Right now, it's what works. I've tried a lot of other methods - time release melatonin, warm milk, prescription sleeping aids . . . the list goes on and none has been effective for me. I know how great I feel after a good night of sleep, though and I'd love that feeling every single day.

Drinking water. Hmmm. I actually love water. I love it mostly when it's hot with a slice of lemon or even a squirt of lemon juice. I buy bottled water by the case so it's always convenient to drink and tastes good. When I slip and drink a soda, I don't crave water, so I try to stay away from soda completely. I also notice when I drink my morning hot water, I'm less apt to drink my coffee. I usually only drink decaf, so it's not a caffeine issue, but if you've seen the tan shade of my coffee, you'd know how much creamer I use and therein lies the problem!

You might notice that although I've titled this post "The Heinie Chronicles," it's more than my heinie that needs help. From my nose to my ankles, I want to be the new and improved version of myself. I believe strongly in positive thinking. Nothing I'm doing now would be near as effective if I spent everyday thinking about how incapable I am and how much I don't like things about my life. So instead, I thank the universe for my health, my family and friends, my job, the things in my life that I love. I tell myself that I'm a good wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend, person. I'm glad for the times when I am methodical and thorough and avert crises. I'm glad that today I will think through situations. I'm glad for the times when I treat others with kindness and respect and hope that today I will do that even better than yesterday. I'm OK with the days when I don't feel joyful. Every day is not my birthday. And when others don't treat me like I want to be treated, I'm glad when I remember that it's not always about me and when it is, I hope I recognize that. And everyday I hope I get better at knowing the difference.

I welcome any comments from others who want to change their heinies (and other stuff!) After all, it's not all about the heinie!

Have a great day! You deserve it!