Wyoming's where it's at, Mom!!
Today my youngest son is driving to Wyoming. The fact THAT he's driving there is not as concerning as WHY he's driving there. Apparently, they have really great fireworks. This is what he's telling me. I don't like fireworks. I mean, I'm patriotic and all, but there are WAY too many things to lose with fireworks - eyebrows, skin, arms, legs, vision, facial features, life, money, friends, SONS. . . ya get the picture. I like fireworks in a controlled, professionally designed arena. Yet, even so, a man in our town who has done fireworks for the sports stadium for years, had a terrible accident, with a lot of damage done to his head and face. I grew up with sparklers and even twirled a few on my baton when I was a kid. I'm just not a really danger junkie these days. My biggest thrills come from watching the occasional scary movie - WITH THE LIGHTS OFF!! I don't run with scissors and I almost never do crack with cold medicine. I wear my seat belt ALWAYS and I stopped skydiving after my 2nd heart attack.
I recently drove through Wyoming TWICE and thought, "Wow, it's big, open and B-O-R-I-N-G. All you folks have is Harrison Ford and Little America. And now, some pretty awesome fireworks. Yeah." I thought Wyoming was what you drive THROUGH, not TO. My mantra today will be "Please be out of the dangerous ones . . . please be out of the dangerous ones. . . please be out of the dangerous ones. . ."
Drive safe, my little pyromaniac.
I recently drove through Wyoming TWICE and thought, "Wow, it's big, open and B-O-R-I-N-G. All you folks have is Harrison Ford and Little America. And now, some pretty awesome fireworks. Yeah." I thought Wyoming was what you drive THROUGH, not TO. My mantra today will be "Please be out of the dangerous ones . . . please be out of the dangerous ones. . . please be out of the dangerous ones. . ."
Drive safe, my little pyromaniac.
6 comments:
My husband would of loved to have gone with your son! He is a fireworks junkie too and I am so not! I hope it all goes well!
How can you make fun of Wyoming without providing a link to "Wyoming, the Musical" from those hilarious American Express commercials??? Sheesh, I have to do everything around here.
Off OFF Broadway, perhaps??? It was funny, tho! Thanks!
I won't even speak of the "W" state. Not only because it's the same letter as President #43 but because his right-hand goon is supposedly from there. How could you let a child of yours go into that God-forsaken land!
Hey, don't forget that Wyoming is also the home of the only mountains in the country named after parts of a woman's body that are usually not open to view. Someone didn't find Wyoming boring.
I have my own firework story, too. I once had a very large firework accidentally explode about a foot over my head resulting in flames leaping a foot and a half high out of my pony-tailed hairsprayed hair. Fortunately, the black bald spot that the flames left was covered up when I let my hair down. I was quite disappointed when I went back to my job at the police department, however, that NO ONE gave me any sympathy.
Hmm, how many ways can I NOT comfort you in that last blog...:)
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